Saturday 27 December 2008

Let's Twist the Shizzy Up and Get All Freaky Deaky

The holidays have been whacky busy and full of social interaction, so there hasn't been much time to blog, and I do think that blogging while on vacation in the east will be sporadic at best, so I thought I'd better drop a line now, while I still can.

Last Sunday, we attended a Solstice celebration hosted by our friends who I will call Virginia and Leonard Woolf. We were fortunate enough to have V and L come to our place on Christmas evening and entertain us with wildly amusing anecdotes, as they are both raconteurs of the first order.

At their Solstice party, Virginia announced that she had scored some "miracle berry" pills off the internets and was going to give them a try. The miracle berry pills have achieved notariety from being featured on CSI: Las Vegas--a woman ingested one and then drank some bleach, which killed her. This was possible (technically) because the miracle berry temporarily inhibits one from tasting bitter or sour flavours. It was Virginia's intention to pop a pill and then sample as many obnoxious/unpleasant foods as possible. She invited the rest of us to join her.

I was in there like a dirty shirt, as was Leonard (who referred to this experience as "dropping food acid") and another mutual friend, the Chic Librarian. After letting the pill dissolve on my tongue, the first thing I tried was a lemon wedge. I stuck it between my teeth and tore off the flesh, expressing all the sour juice into my mouth. To my absolute surprise, the lemon tasted very similar to a sweet mandarin orange. It was yummy!

Next I tried a fresh cranberry, which was more like a blueberry. Strangely enough, the 99% cocoa tasted more like chalk. The straight tabasco sauce licked directly from our palms was interesting: there was the sensation of heat, but not the flavour, so that was very odd. We also had shots of white vinegar, which was not precisely pleasant, but not nearly as vile as usual. In fact, if anything, it reminded me of sekanjibin, a Middle Eastern drink of vinegar and sugar combined.

It was an interesting experience.

Christmas was, too, considering it was the first one without most of the family around. My sister is honeymooning the Maldives, my brother and his wife are on Vancouver Island, and J's family, except her daughter, are out east. So we had my father, Junior, up for a couple of days and he behaved himself quite well. He didn't offend anyone and failed utterly to live up to any of the stories I've told about him. It was nice not have to have to kick the old man in the Jimmy Bubbles for being a crevice tool in front of friends.

Alas, I have a ton of shit to do before our flight at 8:00 tomorrow morning, so I am off to do that. I hope all of your holidays are relaxing and peaceful. The next time I write, it will be from the East Coast!

3 comments:

Cori said...

I'm the Chic Librarian! Neato!

I mean, unless you meant someone else. Since I am neither, and yet it does seem to be me.

Maven said...

I just love your use of "crevice tool."

Hope your holidays and getaway were grand.

Philippe de St-Denis said...

Cori,
That's you for sure!

Maven,
"Crevice Tool" is one of the best insults I know!