Monday 17 March 2014

The Impenetrable Depths of Professor Scruffy

I declined to answer Professor Scruffy's inquiry regarding a suitable time to give me his gouges for sharpening. The next day, he sent me another private Facebook message that said simply "THEE."

I was confounded. What did this mean? Was it some obscure code, standing perhaps for "To Hell, Effete Elitist"? Somehow, I doubt that he has ever heard the word "effete", so that's probably not it. Yet how was I to reply? With an equally emphatic "THOU"?

Suddenly, I realized I had already wasted too much time and energy on the subject, and deleted his second message, too.

I am currently reading We Need To Talk About Kevin, by Lionel Shriver. This is the novel that inspired the film starring the ephemeral Tilda Swinton, about a boy with mental health issues who kills some of his classmates. I have not seen the film, and I'm still not sure how I feel about the novel, being only nine pages in. The cover tells me that We Need To Talk About Kevin is the winner of the Orange Prize (?) and promises me further delights such as Insights and Interviews. This makes me vaguely worried, as if this novel has been poisoned by the touch of Oprah and her Jodi Piccoult-loving legions.

Anyway, I just finished Guy Vanderhaeghe's The Last Crossing, which was spectacular, and therefore has set a pretty high standard for Mr. Shriver to meet. And so far, not so much. I'll give it until the end of the first chapter before I make up my mind, but the jury is still out.

Life is too short to waste on crappy writing (or television or film or music or anything else, for that matter).

5 comments:

Keith said...

Our book club assigned Something about Kevin. I couldn't read it. But that's just me. I'll have to look for the Last Crossing.

Philippe de St-Denis said...

Keith,

I don't think I'm going to last. I have a sneaking suspicion that I'll watch the movie instead, and save myself a lot of time and frustration. The format of the novel so far is epistolary, which is fine, but people don't talk like that in letters. And I'm finding the prose a little dense, and not in a good way.

I think you will like The Last Crossing. It is gorgeously written, and has a twist ending that I wasn't anticipating. And no foul Oprah odour.

Maven said...

LOL @ [...] "this novel has been poisoned by the touch of Oprah and her Jodi Piccoult-loving legions[...]

I seriously dislike Oprah's "book club." What drivel.

Philippe de St-Denis said...

Maven,

I appreciate that her motivation was to get her disciples to read, but aside from Maya Anjelou, it seemed to me that most of the books she recommended were mediocre at best. Possibly she did not want to challenge her audience too much, which is sad. I hate the Lowest Common Denominator, and might just blog about it soon.

Keith said...

I was in a book club for a while that had a string of Oprah picks, and they were ok. Not all my taste, but that's what book clubs are about. So we decided to do a "not Oprah" pick. And the next week it was chosen. So then we got a book guaranteed not to be an Oprah. It was called "Follow the River, and it was the girlhood favourite of one of the members. It was beyond dreadful. At the next meeting we all said, Oprah is just fine.